What if that was me...

My mommy has a friend who went a long ways away to go bring her little girl, Katie, home.  I would love to be Katie's friend.  Katie has Down Syndrome like me, and she has lots of brothers and sisters now like I do, but she has had a very different life than I have had.

I was born to a mommy who loved me and stayed by my side every day that I was in the hospital, and then she I was strong enough she took me home.  Katie never new knew her mother and until her new mommy came and found her, she had spent every day of her life in a place like a hospital, but no one took good care of her their.

I was taught to do the things that I couldn't learn to do on my own - I was taught to feed myself, to help get my clothes on, to walk and run and things like that.  Katie stayed in her crib all day, every day.  She was never taught how to do anything.

I had my diaper changed many times every day, and I was fed three meals a day and lots of snacks too.  I got lots of nummy mommy's milk for my first few months, and healthy formula after that until I could start eating real food.  Then I got to try lots of different foods and I loved most of it. Katie was given a bottle every day, propped up so the formula would run down her throat, make her choke, and a lot of it got on her bed.  I had to have my liquids thickened for a long time so I wouldn't breath in the fluids and get breathing problems.  Katie probably ended up breathing the liquids and getting sick from that happening.

I was talked to, hugged, kissed, cuddled and rocked to sleep. If I woke up during the night, my mommy would feed and care for me and help me to go back to sleep.  Katie was rarely held or touched except for bottle feeding and diaper changes, but the diaper changes were only once a day.  If Katie woke up at night there was no one to hear her cries except for the other children in their cribs.

My mommy carefully weighed me regularly to make sure I was gaining weight like I should and I did great - in fact I'm big for my age!  Katie was probably weighed and when she went home to be with her forever family she weighed only 10 1/2 pounds.  That's not bad for a newborn, but she was NINE YEARS OLD!  I weighed that when I was 2 months old, and I had a big heart problem that made it hard for me to gain weight!

My mommy took me to the doctor when I got sick.  Katie and her friends have probably never seen a doctor until her mommy found her.  If I had lived where Katie lived I would have died.  Many children die in that house - 18 in just one year.  This is so sad.

Thankfully my friend Katie no longer lives at that hospital like place called Plevin.  Thankfully God brought Katie to her forever family and now she's just like me! Well, almost.  But Katie is growing fast - she weighs probably over 30 pounds now.  She isn't walking yet, but she's learning by using a special walking machine.  She gets lots of therapy, especially from her brothers and sisters just like I do.  She's learned to feed herself, and she never gets a bottle anymore.  The best thing she has learned is that she is loved.  She is happy now and always well cared for.

I think the best thing that Katie has gotten to do since she came home to her forever family is to go outdoors.  She's played in the sprinkler, swung in a swing, swam in the lake and enjoyed all the beautiful flowers too.  She loves to do those things just like I do.

But do you know what is really sad?  There are so many other children living at Plevin.  Still waiting for their forever families to rescue them from that terrible place.  Maybe people are working to make Plevin better, but it will never compare to having a home where they are loved and cherished all day, every day.

My mommy want you to help - go to Katie's mommy's blog post to see some of the children still living in plevin and see if your forever child is there.  Or help the Brown's to adopt Gemma by sending money to them through Reece's Rainbow.  Or maybe you could become a Prayer Warrior or an Orphan Warrior like my mommy did!  Just do something. These children need a loving home like I have, like Katie has. It's just that simple.

Esther's Dedication

Sorry I haven't posted in a while - my laptop is in for repairs, and I've had a very busy week.

I'm behind on everything it seems, but I'm making progress - paid some bills and went to lots of appointments (5 dentist appts in one morning, at two different dentist offices - I would never have scheduled it like that, but it worked out surprisingly well!).  I've been working on laundry, but have so much more to do!

Esther is doing well - still no feeding tube, and she's gained some weight - not as much as the doctor was hoping for, but close enought for her first entire week without a feeding tube.

The best news of the week is that we are going to be deicating Esther this Sunday - Sanctity of Life Sunday!  How special is that!  I was just checking to make sure I have my stats correct and it was - as quoted from Wikipediae "A 2002 literature review of elective abortion rates found that 91–93% of pregnancies in the United States with a diagnosis of Down syndrome were terminated." 

Isn't that sad!  So having Esther dedicated on Sancitiy of Life Sunday is just so special!  It is our pro-life statment!

Many you know that Sarah Palin (who ran for the vice presidency last year) has a baby with Down Syndrome - here's her statement about how she views her son, Trig - "Trig is beautiful and already adored by us. We knew through early testing he would face special challenges, and we feel privileged that God would entrust us with this gift and allow us unspeakable joy as he entered our lives. We have faith that every baby is created for good purpose and has potential to make this world a better place. We are truly blessed."

In case you missed it, here's what I had to say about Esther and Down Syndrome in a post last month -

"We believe that God has created Esther exactly the way He wants her to be. The way we needed her to be.  She is a precious gift from God.  She is exactly what God saw as best for our family.  I wouldn’t have her any other way.  God is working in our family through her and her circumstances."

If you want to be there for this special event, it will be at Silverbeach Community Church in Bellingham, WA at the 10:30 service.  Show up early to ensure you get a seat as last week the second service was full and it was just an average Sunday!  There's refreshments served before the service from 9:45 - 10:20 also!

So pray that God will protect us from illness so that we can all be there together when Esther is dedicated to the Lord, and that her life will continue to touch many live for His Glory!

One week at home!

And 11 days after Esther's open heart surgery.  Boy the time has gone fast, and I can not believe how fast Esther has recovered from such a major surgery!

Here's some photos of her right after surgery (these might be hard for some to view, sorry about that....but without seeing them you just can't understand what a dramatic improvement Esther has gone through)

Here's Esther the day before her surgery - notice how distended her tummy is?  That's because her heart is so enlarged:

Esther moments after we got to see her for the first time after surgery:

And here's the bank of machines putting medications through Esthers IVs (later the two ones that are off were also in use for feeding her and a new medication):

Here's Esther the morning of day 2, just before they took her off the ventilator:

Here's Esther on day 2 after they removed the ventilator:

And here's the miraculous change - here she is just 2 days later, on day 4:

We went home the next day, and on the following day, day 6 (Saturday), she was enjoying some time in her swing watching the butterflies:

And lastly, here she is today, showing off her soon-to-be-scar - her belly is still big, as her heart is still enlarged, but some of that is because she had just finished off 50 ccs of milk! The cardiologist says that it will take a few weeks for the heart to go to it's normal/healthy size as it is still recovering from the surgery.

Oh, and here's a great photo of the biggest snowman ever seen in these parts (Jonathan is 5 ft 11 inches if that gives you some reference for the size of the snowman):

I''m sure you are wondering how our day trip to Children's went - it started out difficult - a flat tire and news of road closures and flooding! We saw some of the flooding once I swapped cars with Daryl (when I finally got ahold of him after several phone calls, I found out that his place of work was flooded with around 6 inches of water and they had been forced to turn off all power so they wouldn't be electrocuted while they got the water out of the building!).
We went through water over the freeway by Lake Samish (seeing a "water over the roadway" sign when going 60 MPH on the freeway will definitely get ones heart-rate up, that's for sure!
We arrives only 45 minutes late for the appointment, and from there things went really smoothly - her check up was great, they said she was doing really well, and really loosened up the parameters for her feeding. Basically I could feed her however I want, as long as she gains at least 1/2 and ounce per day over all! Yeah! Now I can relax a little!
I even went so far as to pull her feeding tube this morning as she got all her daytime feeds through the bottle without using the pump or the feeding tube in anyway yesterday, and she was fighting some congestion that I was sure would improve if the feeding tube was out of the way!
The one draw back to removing the feeding tube would be that she wouldn't be getting a constanst feeding through the night - but this morning she woke up really hungry at 5 am anyway, so I think she's ready to ditch the tube and eat like normal babies! Well see how tonight goes - she downed around 70 ccs before falling asleep tonight (she drank it all in around 15 minutes as apposed to taking 1 1/2 hours to take that much before her surgery!).
Also, she's down to just two medications! She's still on Lasix, but they only have her taking .5 ml twice a day (she was at 1.5 ml three times a day before surgery), and a thyroid medication once a day. Both of which I can give her through her bottle with her milk! They are planning to go down to once a day for the Lasix after her next checkup in a month, and then get rid of it all together soon after that! She'll probably be on the thyroid medication her whole life though. But I can live with that!
Today was my first official day back to work (I've been just doing emails and bossing everyone around for what seems like forever), and boy was it exhausting! But we got a lot done, and there's work for all our seamstresses for this week at least! It's so hard to know what to do with this terrible law about lead testing hanging over our heads! If the law is not amended, our entire line of diapers and trainers will be unsellable in just 4 short weeks! The Eco products I can keep going with and have tested, but the diversity of the regular line is just not compatible with the type of testing they are requiring! If they will allow component testing, some of the Snap-EZ line will be salvageable, but not all of it. So we have decided to concentrate on the Eco line for now, and not put anymore Snap-EZ stuff into production until we know where we stand with the Feb 10 deadline! At least we started the Eco line this year, and the Snap-EZ 4 Life line will not be effected by this ruling in the least, so all is not lost.
I must get to bed, as I'm sure Esther will be noticing that she doesn't have that feeding tube in place tonight!

Crazy Day

Mondays can be that way.

While I was pumping this morning, I had turned on the radio so keep Esther calm, and they were asking people to call into the radio station and tell them what you were looking forward to in 2009.  Man, I really thought about calling in!  I'm looking forward to a year that will not be 2008 - it was a tought year right from the beginning - but I'll get into that in a separate post later....

Today was indeed crazy! It took until 10 am before I had everything ready for taking Esther out for the day and had her fed, and catch up on 13 phone messages and making dental, orthodontist/oral surgery appts for some kids, and paying some overdue bills.

I got everything in the car, and headed out.  But I only got 20 feet out of the garage before the station wagon got high centered in the deep snow.  We were saved by Kenda, my dear friend and our shipping gal/office manager. She gave us a ride to our doctors appt (she was smart enough to park at the end of our 400 ft long driveway, ensuring that she'd get out again.

Esther's Dr appt went well - she still weighs 11 pound 15 oz - the same she weighed on the 2nd of Dec.  She also got her stitches out from the hole left when the drainage tube was removed (she doesn't have any stitches from her incision as they closed that with some kind of surgical super glue).  She didn't like that part.  Then Daryl and I drove him back to work so I'd have a car for my errands.

Then we did some shopping and banking, and the went to JoAnns to get some fabric to make larger blankets for Esther (like receiving blankets, only bigger as she is so hot to hold, and having a thin blanket between her and you makes it so much more comfortable for both of us, but she's starting to get too big for some of her blankets.).  Then we picked up Daryl  and went to Costco for a few odds and ends - small shopping trip for us as we spent under $150!

Then we had dinner at Billy McHales ( we split an order of potato skins, and split a dinner and a dessert!), then stopped by Grandpa and Grandma Einfeld's so they could see Esther, and then made for home.

The kids unloaded the car and carried everything down our long driveway while I got Esther ready for bed (medications and feeding as well as pumping and preparing her over night milk).

Tomorrow's a stay at home/make blankets/catch up on emails day, and Wednesday we have follow up appointments at Children's.And please pray for my sister, Lisa, as it is looking like she does have a tumor/cancer or something and her doctor has referred her to an oncologist.  She has an appointment for a consultation on Thursday, and they will probably schedule surgery at that time.  She is in good spirits, and is relying on God and His sovereign loving care through this time of waiting, and I'm so proud of her.  Pray that she will continue to rest in the knowledge that God loves her and is in control of even this.

I was reminded of a song by Rich Mullens today, it was playing on the radio, it's called Hold Me Jesus, and it's so where I am, and I'd love to share it with you, especially you, Lisa (she reads my blog everyday, so post here if you have any encouraging words for her!)

Hold Me Jesus

"Well sometimes my life just don't make sense at all
When the mountains look so big
And my faith just seems so small

So hold me Jesus 'cause I'm shaking like a leaf
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace

And I wake up in the night and feel the dark
It's so hot inside my soul
I swear there must be blisters on my heart

So hold me Jesus 'cause I'm shaking like a leaf
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace

Surrender don't come natural to me
I'd rather fight You for something I don't really want
Than to take what You give that I need
And I've beat my head against so many walls
Now I'm falling down I'm falling on my knees

And this Salvation Army band is playing this hymn
And Your grace rings out so deep
It makes my resistance seem so thin

I'm singing hold me Jesus 'cause I'm shaking like a leaf
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace

(Interestingly enough, Rich Mullens recorded this song in 1993,  and he was killed in a freak car accident on 1997.  He was one of the best Christian recording artists ever - I love all his music.  He even gave away all his profits - lived on an average American salary, and the rest was donated to non profit agencies - mostly those working with Native Americans - do a Google search and learch about his life and death and the beautiful songs her wrote and recorded!)

The other song, Praise You in this Storm, kept running through my mind today at odd time, especially after talking with Lisa this evening.  I've linked to before, but just in case you are new to my blog, here it is again:

Praise You in this Storm

I was sure by now
God You would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again, I say "Amen", and it's still raining

But as the thunder rolls
I barely hear Your whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
Every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I remember when
I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry
You raised me up again
My strength is almost gone
How can I carry on
If I can't find You

As the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
Every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and Earth
I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and Earth

Now it's off to bed as, for some strange reason I'm completely exhausted (Jennifer - I got your advise too late! LOL)

Awwwww.....

You would not believe how wonderful it was to take a long bath, snooze on the couch while the family watched a movie, and then, above all else, sleep in my own bed!  I haven't slept that soundly in weeks, and it was sooooo refreshing!  When her feeding pump sounded at 2am it took me a while to figure out where I was and what I needed to do!

Daryl and I were bummed that we'd miss seeing our new home in snow, but guess what?  We got home and there's still close to a foot of snow here!  We actually can't even get our cars to the house yet! Here's what our new home looks like in the snow - isn't it pretty?



So we had to unload at the end of the driveway, and walk in (our driveway is about 450 ft long!).  Daryl's working on getting the camaro running (the battery is dead, and we think the alternator is toast as well), as it is in front of the station wagon, and then see if we can get the cars down the driveway - I'm not real comfortable with not having any cars at the house, and the driveway blocked and Esther just home from open heart surgery - on discharge they gave me a list of things, that if I see any one of those signs, I am to call 911 immediately.  I did talk with my friend, Laurie (her husband is a firefighter and works in the same fire hall as my brother, Mark, in Bellevue (small world, eh?)), and she told me that if need be, they will walk in and carry out through the snow.  That eases my mind some, but if we can fix things, that would be much better!

But the best news today is that Esthe drank an entire 75 cc feeding from her bottle - it took a couple of drinking sessions, and just over 2 hours, but she did it!!!!  Look out feeding tube, your days are numbered!

Here's Esther in her favorite place - swinging in her butterfly swing:
Esther in Baby Swing Video

We are Home!

We got to come home today!  yeah!  We even got a ride home - by my Aunt Marylin!  She saw me post about working out going home as we sent all the cars home with the kids, and she knew that God wanted her to give us a ride home.  She lives in Bellingham, so she drove down to spend time with her kids on Thursday and if we got out before Saturday, she'd be able to give us a ride home!  It worked out beautifully, and as always, I loved spending time with her!

It's been a long day, and my camera is still packed, so I'll keep this short so I can get to bed before midnight!

Esther still has some potential problems, like infection or illness or being handled wrong (if you pick her up by her arm pits or arms, her sternum could be cracked), so please continue to pray that her recovery will go smoothly.  She has an appt with her pediatrician on Monday, and we have to return to Children's on Wednesday for a follow up with a cardiologist, including an echocardiogram and EKG (she had both of those today and they all looked great!)

Thanks so much for all your prayers and words of encouragement through these trying weeks!

Esther might go home tomorrow!

She's doing great!  She's off everything, even her IV!  She's on all oral medications right now, and taking a bottle for some of her feedings.  She's about where she was before her troubles that started at the beginning of December, taking around 40 ccs by bottle, and then we give her another 60 ccs through her feeding tube.

The key to her going home is that she needs to be gaining weight, but not retaining fluids (making sure that taking her Lasix orally is working and that she is on the right dosage).  Tomorrow morning's weight will tell all.  This morning compared to yesterday afternoon was good, so that much is good.

We got her bed all set up with her new and old friends watching over her:



Oh and she's got her smile back - she doesn't give out a lot of them, but she;s definitely smiling again.

The only pain reliever she's on is tylenol, and if she didn't ever get hick-ups, she probably wouldn't even need that.

The challenge is picking up and holding her - we can't pick her up using her arm pits - she needs to be scooped up.

They said she could be laid on hertummy against your chest, but that would really depend on her level of comfort, and so far, she doesn't like it at all, so cuddling the way like to cuddle Esther will have to wait a little longer. But, right now I can pick her up and hold her all I want.

Esther even got a bath today! We couldn't let her incision get soaked, so it didn't have as much water as usual, but she definitely got a bath, and man did she ever need it - mostly from adhesives left from surgery.

She looked so cute after her bath:



And last but not least, Happy New Year everyone!

Esther is out of CICU

Esther has moved to "the floor" today!  She's doing great, and has even been off morphine since early this morning, and just on Tylenol and resting comfortably!  They will be removing her central line as well as her arterial IV, and then placing a new peripheral IV before she goes to the floor.  She's been getting breast milk by feeding tube all night, increasing from 5 ccs per hour to 25 ccs per hour this morning.  She hasn't had even one episode of reflux at all.

Here's a sweet photo I got of her late last night when she was bundled to get her temperature back up:



She has been having mucus in her  throat, and for some reason she doesn't like to cough.  They used deep suctioning to get rid of it last night, but this morning, they really want her to cough it up, and so far she's doing well.  She's been having trouble regulating her temperature - bundle her and she gets too warm (like 99.9), but if left with out a blanket she gets really cool.  Sometimes even just a blanket loosely over her can make her too warm too!  Hopefully she'll level off once we can get clothes on her (once her lines are out she can wear clothes again.

She also gets to start binky training again today!  She will be so happy!  She's been sucking for all she's worth whenever she's not sleeping.

I finally went through my memory card and got some of the photos we took last weekend when Esther got many visitors!

First Uncle Ed, Aunt Denise, and Uncle Duane came by:



Aunt Denise even got some smiles from Esther:



Then Auntie Lisa came and had a great time talking with Esther:



Auntie Lisa brought Esther the cutest Lady Bug, whom we will call "Lady" - Esther loves the bright colors - we suspended her from the mobile above the swing, and soon Esther was taking aim and hitting Lady like she was a pinata!




Then after lunch, Daryl's sister, Jeanne (Esther's middle name is Jeanne), and her family came by on their way home to Indiana!

Here's Esther with her cousin Caitlyn - she had the touch and soon Esther was sound asleep, and sprawled in her lap"




And here are Caityn's brothers, Aaron (has his pilot's license and is going to college), Nathan (also attending college), and Derrick (he and Caitlyn are in high school):


and here's Jeanne and Dave laughing with Daryl:


That was a lot of visitors, that's for sure!

It is well with my Soul

 This morning my Itunes was playing "It Is Well With My Soul"

It is well with my Soul

When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.


It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.


Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
Let this blessed assurance control,
That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,
And hath shed His own blood for my soul.


It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.


My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!
My sin, not in part but the whole,
Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,
Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!


It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.


And Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,
The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;
The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,
Even so, it is well with my soul.


It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

- Words by Horatio G. Spafford, 1873
- Music by Philip P. Bliss, 1876
The words to this hymn was written after two major traumas in Spafford's life. The first was the Great Chicago Fire of October 1871, which ruined him financially. Shortly after, while crossing the Atlantic, all four of Spafford's daughters died in a collision with another ship. Spafford's wife Anna survived and sent him the now famous telegram: "SAVED ALONE." Several weeks later, as Spafford's own ship passed near the spot where his daughters died, he was inspired to write these words.


Bliss originally named the tune "Ville de Havre" after the ship on which Spafford's four girls perished, the SS Ville de Havre. Ironically, Bliss himself died in a tragic train wreck shortly after writing this music.

(http://www.the-synergy.com/lyrics/itiswell.html)

This morning I reflect on all I have gone through this year, and I see that God has lead me through very difficult trials, but that through it all, He has given me the grace to stand faithful to His call.   In light of the tragedies that Horatio Spafford went through (it doesn't mention it above, but preceeding the fire, his only son died suddenly at just 2 years of age), my plight seems small indeed.

I got to hold her!

She is uncomfortable when she is moved, but soon settles in.  She had a great awake period after I held her, but I was so exhausted, I just had to sleep, so she got some daddy time instead.

Here we are all together:



Getting her into my arms is a three ring circus - she has more lines that you could ever imagine!!

And here she is during her super awake time - she was evenbatting at her Lady Bug toy from Auntie Lisa!



We found out today that our propane tank is empty - the kids came home to a cold house, could water, and Daryl's shop smelled like propane - that 500 gallon tank was topped off in October, so we are thinking that something went wrong with the heater in he shop and it drained the tank. This is very upsettiing as it is a fire hazard and that is hundreds of dollars of propane gone. This month has not been easy on our finances, and December is notorious for being slow in the cloth diaper market...and thei year was definitely no exception.

I'm not sure how we are going to make ends meet over the next couple of weeks, but I know God will provide.

Day 2

Esther is looking so much better!  They've removed the drainage tube and wires from her chest, her urinary catheter, her stomach suctioning tube, and her breathing tube!  She's breathing on her own, and is getting very little oxygen.  She breaths soooo slow now that I just can't get used to it!

Oh - and she's past the critical "first 24 hours", so unless she develops an infection, things should go great from here on out.  She'll be coming out of ICU sometime tomorrow, or maybe Thursday at the latest.

If you remember, her "baseline" for breathing was 60 - 70 breaths per minute, but now she's 20 - 30!   It almost scares me into thinking she isn't breathing!  I haven't been able to hold her yet, as they just removed the breathing tube about an hour ago, and they wanted her to rest and level out before we hold her.  So I took a shower and Daryl and I had lunch together.  She's still sleeping, so we are waiting for her to wake up.

Jessica and the kids are on their way home right now. They wanted and needed to be home.  Daryl is staying here, and we are with out a car, but Jessica can come down when she gets discharged, or maybe God will surprise us with an unexpected ride home like last time when Daryl's sister-in-law had to be down here for a doctor's appointment and was able to pick Esther and I up and take us home!  Who know!

Today I'm really tired and out of sorts - I think the stress of the last few days has really taken a toll on me.  I'm going to make this short for now and take a nap until Esther wakes up.  I'll try to post some photos tonight!

On the other side now for 5 hours

Esther is doing well.  She's heavily sedated, but she does respond to my voice.  I am so exhausted I don't want to do anything, so I'm going to keep this short.  They are going to keep her on the ventilator until morning and possibly longer since her lungs have been so overworked lately and still had fluid in them.  With the ventilator in she's not working hard,  so it will be easier for her right now this way.  I won't be able to hold her until the ventilator is out, so I'm just resting here.

We did find out that in CICU a parent can stay in the room and there's a couch/bed.  That was such a relief as the "caves" are full, and the RMH will only allow 6 in the room.  The 4 oldest boys went home, so we don't have the hotel room anymore, so that meant we had one extra person.  We were trying to make arrangements with a brother, and it would have worked out, but it's so nice not to have to deal with that now!

My sister is going to stop by tomorrow before she leaves, and she was able to talk with her doctor.  She'll be having surgery once she gets home.  Lisa sounded so much better today, and God is giving her much grace right now.  She was so relieved to hear that Esther was doing so well.

We also got a visit from Pastor Steve - yes, he drove down her from Bellingham today just to see us and Esther and pray with us.  Now that's a caring pastor!

Here is a photo Daryl took of Esther while I was cuddling with her, waiting for the call to go to the OR this morning:



And here's on he took just after we were able to see Esther in the CICU:



She's not really looking at me, I was just trying to stand where she could see me if she was able.

I'll try to blog more and catch up on photos of Esther visiting with her auntie Lisa as well as her cousins from Indiana!

Please pray for Esther as she goes through this critical first 24 hours - there's still many things that could go wrong, but she's made it through most of her hurdles.  And also pray that she won't get any infections or illnesses.  Thanks so much for supporting us through all of this!

she's in ICU

All is well and we should be able to go back to see her any moment.
Praise the Lord
I can not describe how relieved I am!!!!!!!!!

Esther's off the bipass...

And everything is looking great! We should hear from them again in about an hour - they still have to close everything up and work her way to CICU. The next call will be for us to go talk with the surgeons and then we should get to be with her soon after that.

Esther's on the bypass machine

They just let us know that she's doing great...that was fast!
I'm so tired I can,t keep my eyes open, so I'm going to nap until the next call.

we are waiting...

We just got the first of 4 pages, this one was to tell us that they had started and that things are going fine so far. The next page will be to let us know that she is on the heart lung machine and they see what needs to be done.
So far, so good.
Handing her to the nurse and walking away was the hardest thing I have ever done.
My sister, Lisa, will be going home tomorrow, and she hopes to come by later today. She doing well under the circumstances, but please pray that she will experience the peace that passes understanding while she waits to go home and get to the bottom of her pain.
I will post again after the next page (I'm using my blackberry to post today).

In the Garlic Press

We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. 2 Cor. 4: 8-9 (NIV)

I don't know what to say....I really thought things would not bet  getting anymore difficult  than they already are. I was wrong.

My sister is going to be heading home to California tomorrow to have some biopsies done to figure out what's going on.  I feel so bad for her.  She's tried to hard to eat right and live a healthy lifestyle, yet has had to undergo 2 major surgeries this year, and now this.  My last phone conversation with her this evening we were both encouraging eachother to not worry about this, but to trust God because we can't change anything by worrying about what might be or what might not be.

I was totally losing it earlier, and still feel like I'm on the edge, but I'm also feeling a sense of peace again.  I just know that if I get any sleep tonight, it will a gift directly from God.

My Polyanna moment (man I need t play the glad game tonight) for tonight is that I am soooo glad that she was able to come and have such a great visit with us today.  Esther was wide awake, talking to her Auntie Lisa and smiling.  Here's one of the photos I took today - you can see that Esther is really telling her Auntie Lisa all about something, and it must be something she really liked:



We had many visitors over the last couple of days, and I've got lots of photos to share, but I'm going to wait until Esther's out of surgery and I'm spending time in ICU with her (can't use cell phones, but I can be online with my laptop in there!).  So I'll catch you up then, as well as post updates as often as necessary as Esther recovers.

Quickly...

Esther's surgery is tomorrow morning.  We will walk her to the OR at 7:15 am.  We will get updates periodically during the surgery, and we should be able to see here again around noon.

Today my sister came to visit, and then headed towards my sister's house, stopping to do some shopping.  She had some severe abdominal pain, and ended up driving herself to the hospital and is still undergoing tests to find out what is causing this pain.

Tomorrow is my uncle's funeral as well.

Please pray for all these needs, and for peace for me through this difficult night.

I'll probably blog later if I can't sleep, but for now, I'm cherishing Esther!

Thanks1

While we wait...

we cherish.  I'm enjoying some great times with Esther.  Almost each day she does something new. Starting yesterday she was sucking on her upper lip so loudly you could hear it out in the hall if the door was open!  She's also been fascinated with her tongue, licking her lips, or just pining it between her lips like this:



Today she laughed twice.  I just can not get enough of her smiles!  She's reportedly the cutie on the floor - nurses come in and say they heard rumors that there was a really cute baby around here, and they all say the same thing..."she's so cute" or "you are so cute" if they are talking to her!  Here's some photos I took today of her:

First, here she is seriously talking to here daddy:



And here she is during a smile fest with me this evening:





Hope you enjoy these photos as much as we've enjoyed seeing Esther bloom and grow!

Merry Christmas Everyone!

This will be short and sweet.  Very little happened today.  We all had breakfast together at The House, and then we tidied the room, and then I left with Jessica for a quiet morning with Esther.  Then my breakfast attacked me, and I took some pepsid and a long nap.  My stomach was better, but not good.  Then Jessica swapped places with Daryl, and we had lunch together.  To be nice to my stomach, my lunch was not the Christmas dinner, but vanilla yogurt, toast with butter, and vanilla pudding.  Boring, but nice to my sore stomach.

We spent the afternoon quietly watching TV while I cuddled with Esther.  Then Santa stopped by, and we got a cute stuffed puppy and a photo with Santa - it's actually a really cute photo as Esther is really staring at Santa!  It's a poloroid, so I can't share it, sorry.

Then Esther was sucking on her lips so much and with such energy, we decided to let her do some binky training - she loved it! They had 10 ccs (1/3 oz) in the first syringe, and when that was done, she got really ticked - and she took in all but .5 ccs of the second syringe and then was very satified - you know, the little grunting breaths that babies do when their tummy's full (daddies have been known to do this after Christmas dinner too!).

Then we to take her to dinner with us, and back to her room.  She fell asleep when we were almost to her room and is now resting peacefully!

Merry Christmas!

God Bless Us, every One!